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A Reflection on the Patriarchy

4/14/2020

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Patriarchy. A word that the modern world has deemed as the greatest plague of all time. However, as we see young people inching back to more traditional gender roles and a more conservative way of life, is there hope for future generations and the restoration of society? I believe the answer is yes. Since the beginning of time men have always led. From Adam to Peter to probably your own grandfather, men have always been seen as the head of the household and therefore the primary provider for the family. So why is there sudden push for women to take the roles men have held for so long? Since the toxic second wave of feminism, women have been fighting for so called “equality.” However, I would argue that most modern women have a misconstrued view of gender and societal gender roles because of women’s fight for equality. This can be seen even in the Church as "Catholics" are fighting for women to be able to enter the priesthood, even though men have led the church since the beginning of time, and only men can be ordained.
God deliberately created men and women different. This statement doesn’t just relate to a physical standpoint, but also a mental one as well. The CCC specifically states, “Everyone, man and woman, should acknowledge and accept his sexual identity. Physical, moral, and spiritual difference and complementary are oriented toward the goods of marriage and the flourishing of family life. The harmony of the couple and of society depends in part on the way in which the complementary, needs, and mutual support between the sexes are lived out” (No. 2333). The catechism states that the two genders male and female are physically, morally, and spiritually different, yet complimentary. This means men and women not only have different bodily autonomy, but the way they think is also completely different. This is why women were not allowed in combat for a very long time. Studies were done and when a man and a woman were in combat together the man would often end up protecting the woman rather than fighting the enemy. The man and woman had no connection other than their uniform, yet the man’s natural instinct told him he needed to protect the woman from danger, even if it meant his own life was in more danger.

So why are modern people so against a traditional patriarchal society? Two common arguments are a traditional society supports a “Rape Culture” and patriarchy leads to “toxic masculinity”. A “Rape Culture” is where men have the right to overpower women and hurt them whenever they feel like it. No one who lives or supports a traditional way of living will agree with this. In ancient times women were considered to be an invalid source and this is why in the matter of he-said she-said a woman’s opinion simply did not matter. Women did not want to confess to matters of sexual assault because there were no organizations or laws in place to protect women or even give them a matter of opinion. Often women were just convicted of adultery and stoned to death for a crime they often did not commit. However, since the establishment of Rape Crisis Centers women now a voice receive help for themselves and punishment for their assaulter. Most modern people will agree on the fact that rape is bad and shouldn’t happen and women who want to return to a traditional way of living will agree on this notion too.

The second most common argument for an anti-patriarchal society is the idea of toxic masculinity. I would argue this is not a real thing. I would argue a “toxic man” isn’t being “toxic” because he is a man, rather he is just being a bad person or has not been properly given the tools in his younger life to properly deal with his emotions. In ancient societies men were taught they had to be leaders and to show emotion was weakness.

These
withheld emotions often came out at other times, such as when a man was alone with his wife. This man is not toxic for not being able to express his emotions properly when he was taught all his life not to. Labeling his lack of vulnerability and ability to cope with his emotions as “toxic masculinity” is not helping the problem. Even now when young children fall, we often tell little boys to toughen up and stop crying. Yet we hold young girls and tell them it’ll be okay. By this small act we are invalidating the little boy’s feelings that he is hurting. This often makes the little boy only feel he has done wrong by crying. Therefore, learning to hide his emotions because from a young age he has be told they are bad. Instead we should acknowledge the little boy was hurting, but it’ll be okay, and he can go play again. This instills validation that he was hurt but he is strong enough to continue on. We need to instill strong core values in all of our children and give them the tools strong individuals.
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So why do people still view a male led society as a horrible thing? I believe it is because of the anti-religious notion of modern Americans that have contributed to the misconstrued mindset of people everywhere, because wearing dresses is now oppressive to women and being a Christian is frowned upon, and the traditional Catholic is looked upon to be Satan incarnate. However, we can identify that that is just the devil’s agenda working through Americans everywhere. As we are all in isolation and millions of families are being quarantined everywhere, we can see some positives happening in the household. Mothers are staying home for work to help their children in their schoolwork. The family is being reunited to a more close-knit group rather than a bunch of screen zombies who eat dinner together occasionally. With the discontinuation of sports programs, siblings are actually seeking to talk to each other instead of just sitting on a couch not communicating. As I was watching Mass on Easter, during the homily the priest said, “It is no coincidence this virus hit during lent because through this virus the average person is forced to give up every common convenience we have taken for granted and revert back to the most basic principle of life, the family.” This could not be truer, and I truly believe we will all come out of this time as stronger and closer-knit families than ever before.
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Written by Hannah Monnier
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